Covering the desert with flowers ~ J. K.


Being nothing, being a desert in oneself, one hopes through another to find water.  Being empty, poor wretched, insufficient, devoid of interest or importance, one hopes through another to be enriched.  Through the love of another, one hopes to forget oneself.  Through the beauty of another, one hopes to acquire beauty.  Through the family, through the nation, through the lover, through some fantastic belief, one hopes to cover this desert with flowers.  And God is the ultimate lover.  So one puts hooks into all these things. 

In this, there is pain and uncertainty, and the desert seems more arid than ever before.  Of course it is neither more nor less arid; it is what it was, only one has avoided looking at it while escaping through some form of attachment with its pain, and then escaping from that pain into detachment.  But one remains arid and empty as before.

So instead of trying to escape, either through attachment or through detachment, can we not become aware of this fact, of this deep inward poverty and inadequacy, this dull, hollow isolation.  That is the only thing that matters, not attachment or detachment.  Can you look at it without any sense of condemnation or evaluation?…

Are you looking at it from a center with all its conclusions of like and dislike, opinion, judgement, the desire to be free of this emptiness and so on… or are you looking with eyes that are completely free?…

The mind of the “me”, in all its self-centered activity, has created this emptiness, this isolation. And when that mind – without the center – looks, the self-centered activity ends. So the loneliness is not. Then the mind functions in freedom. Looking at the whole structure of attachment and detachment, and the movement of pain and pleasure, we see how the mind of the “me” builds its own desert and its own escapes. When the mind of the “me” is still, then there is no desert, and there is no escape.